Is this love?

There's no gaps in my life I gotta fill,
no connections missing, places to hold,
I got socks for the cold, and my sweaters are better,
never need to be told to hold on, I'm not strong
I'm just bored with the sh**
so I wait for it, watch for it, I predict the hits
I could roll with but I body swerve ahead of the curve
ahead of the game I switch lanes, I stay sane this way
I could play but a roll in the hay won't come up needles,
no prize I'd rather set it on fire and watch it burn
than take turns trading words you won't learn,
I'll raise my hands to the flames
and warm my face on the same fire that keeps me alive,
it's been burning inside
since way before I decided to start breathing it out,
coz I figured it out,
I wasn't meant to be quiet, sitting nodding and smiling and dying
as I curl in the tiniest ball,
I'm still small but I'm bigger than this,
I'm taller, broader and I figure I'm tough enough on my own
for the space that's been taken away,
and I like it this way

Is this love?

So when you're negging me begging to be
what you seem to think of me, telling me you're lonely,
sure, come back when I'm 23 again
or call me when you get there
and let's see if you're still keen on me now
coz what's my age again
forget about it you gotta admit,
it's smaller than the sum of my parts,
I'm an artwork made of muscle and bone
carved in marble and encrusted with the stones
that just grow in my shoes to walk over,
make grooves I could use
to fix nails made of tall tales into something to do,
and I do it every day
til it works a little better, harder faster forever,
building something I can live in when I'm old and alone,
my own body's got rooms where no one else will ever be going,
and the ceilings are high enough to see to the sky,
coz the stars I been looking for aren't just in my eyes
I'm making space to grow and wearing holes in the toes of my shoes
til I find boots that fit and kick a way through
I'm older than I look but I'm young enough to know
I've got a better time ahead of me
than where you think we're going

Is this love?

So I guess what I'm saying is it's me, not you,
I'm not the answer you're after, I'm not something to do,
I'm not the bonus at the end of whatever level you play,
the end of the line, damn you're fine, stay, get out the next day,
I'm not the answer to your mum asking every holiday if you're gay,
no “Come what may”, we're not f***ing, ok?
I guess the bottom line is what I wanted to say
when you asked is I finally found my way,
I hope you do one day

Is this love?